Cali is wit' it

well, well, well.
i feel like the primary event in my life right now is my recent long weekend trip to san diego, but i don't have much to say about it, except that i'm excited for warm weather to come here to cincy. it was a nice time, though.
while i was gone my friend brought a new little man into the world, and i must say, as i am fresh from holding him in my arms, that he is precious. so that's exciting.

i'm reading this book my mom lent me, which i started reading while i had the flu and got annoyed with. nothing like two 4 and a half hour flights and a five hour delay to make you think twice. i think i just wasn't in the right frame of mind when i had a fever. so, all that to say, it's pretty interesting, and of course has got me thinking :)

the author, carrie mcdonnall, writes in "facing terror" about her time working with arab muslims in iraq and her time leading up to her work there. she tells the story of a tragedy that occurred in her time in the middle east and the aftershock. what's stuck out to me is her writing about when she returns to the u.s. after her first term overseas. she was so excited to come home, but upon return she writes,

"I felt free as a bird. But I never felt free of my concern for my second homeland....
I felt I was missing something in the comfort and security of my home in the United States.... I knew I would probably never felt complete in either place." 110-111

i constantly wonder why i have such a desire burning in me that is yet to be ignited. sometimes i think i'm just confused and that maybe i'm just supposed to live in the u.s. and love it here. but reading her story, the way her heart was shaped, beats true in mine as well. i think i discount it because i wasn't overseas for long, but i can't shake that desire. so i wait.

and on to waiting: something i've been considering a lot as well. there is so much waiting in the Bible: the israelites in the desert for hundreds of years, noah on a boat for 5 months, abraham and sarah having a baby in their hundreds. i'm reminded that God is faithful to his promises, but he is in charge of the timing. so i wait. :)

i feel content in my waiting. it's a weird kind of confused peace i have... one that passes understanding, perhaps? heheh. i really feel like things are being put in my radar- shaping me, leading me, teaching me. and i know that there is life in the meantime, and i am to live it to the fullest extent.

well that's more personal than i usually try to be, but there ya go.

i'm roadtrippin' it (again!) to st. louie this weekend to see my love. i can't wait for some cheeseburgers, coffee and chats!