raise your hopeful voice

sigh. that's how i'm feel right now... just... sigh. not a sigh of happiness or sadness, i think mainly a sigh of contentment. what a good (and foreign) thing that is to me. for the past couple of weeks i have felt unusually peaceful. but it's also kind of a weird numb feeling... it's just strange, really.

i think last time i updated i'd recently seen precious courtney. the following weekend i got to see my other precious, jill. i think seeing those two back to back really aided in my contentment. just talks we had and realizations i came to and encouragement i received and insights we shared... they kinda reshaped the way i've been seeing this time in my life. i was listening to "these friends of mine" by rosie thomas on my way to see jill... the chorus says, "maybe i needed this time to remind myself," it just kinda clicked with me, that maybe this time is partly for me to remind myself, to be reminded of the friendships i am blessed by and to see the importance of those. i was having coffee with some old friends from high school and one of them was talking about how he wouldn't want to be married right now- he said, "if i was married, i couldn't do this." he was so matter of fact. and i think in a lot of ways, he's right. somehow my friends who are married don't seem as young as my single friends. and it reminded me how thankful i really am for my independence, for my friendships, for feeling young and for being free to do what i want when i want. how cool is that? and i have a handful of girls in my life, that when i imagined us all marrying off and assuming those new roles, it made me so sad. hopefully it won't be that way, but in the meantime i appreciate so much those relationships and times together.

and since seeing jill... hmm. well, i turned 25, and it was a decent day. i got to talk to some people i really love, celebrate with friends and family.... and then friday two of my friends threw a surprise party for me, and i was so surprised! i was kind of overwhelmed by the kindness of it all, and how i didn't really deserve any of it, but those feelings didn't take away from having an amazing time and feeling so loved and loving people in my life so much.

and i've had some rest this weekend, too. and i saw Once with my apartment-mate :) that movie left me kind of speechless. and now i'm wallowing in the soundtrack and reliving all of the emotions it evoked in me. it was so beautiful, and emotional, and realistic. it was wonderful.

i just registered for my first marathon. i can't decide if i'm crazy or not. i think i'll be alright... the half marathon was thoroughly enjoyable for me, so i thought maybe a full marathon would be, perhaps slightly less enjoyable, but more challenging, which i consider a good thing. keeps me on my toes. :)

welp i've got some things to do before heading back to work tomorrow. i'm sure i'll have more thoughts soon. i rarely run out.